Blue works hard to keep her floating.. 59
Patty and Steven slept tightly all night in each other's arms. The sadness between them was profound. She took delicate care of her newborn and tried to remain calm and centered. To keep her baby calm, she herself must be so. While she fussed with him, Blue got up and made them some breakfast. He saw the bucket of chicken in the cooler and sighed. He knew Beckster would have loved that cold this morning. He started to feel a deep hole begin and he stopped it immediately. He knew that would not work whatsoever. Rebecka would be found.
Patty came behind him and hugged him tightly. He felt her love and how important that was. Particularly at this juncture in their lives they needed one another. He turned and kissed her. ‘Let’s eat some breakfast and talk. Maybe we can come to some conclusion. We need to find her soon darling. We are leaving and I just cannot fathom not having our Beckster with us.’
Patty saw the plate of marshmallows topped with eggs. She laughed at his meals he comes up with. Then she turned and saw the three chairs and she broke down. Her heart was in two and she had no way of sewing it up. Blue turned and held her tightly. He too had tears to shed. The worry is useless but a side effect of having been a parent for so long.
‘Come here darling, sit down and we will talk.’ Patty quieted down and then she began to think of what Becky had said to her. She stamped her foot and hollered at him. ‘She wanted a house and we never seemed to stay in one very long Blue. That is hard on a little girl, let alone a budding teenager. I wanted a real kitchen too, but we have not had that luxury either.’ She let out so much energy that she slumped to the ground. He picked her up and carried her to the tent.
He lies beside her and listens to her breath. The baby was squirming and soon to find out he is hungry again. She takes a deep sobbing breath and lets it out. She turns and looks at her husband and is horrified. She puts her hands to her mouth and tears begin to roll.
‘Oh my, Blue I did not mean that. She was angry and it seemed to take over me too. I am not unhappy with anything we have done as a family.’ He smiled and caressed her shoulder.
‘Patty, under these conditions, I would suspect you have a few misgivings with our choices. Do not fret my darling. We are soon to move to a new and glorious life. We will find that wild child of ours and make our lives shine once more.’ He glanced over at his son and smiled. ‘Looks like our little Blue is hungry mommy.’ He leaned over and picked up his baby son. Mama was unbuttoning her blouse to get ready for breakfast.
Later after his highness had been fed and changed, they went back out to eat. After wards he still sensed lowness in her. They talked about their plans for the east. It would be much better when the family had all of this behind them.
'Let’s go over to her tent and try something. He had her take her time and yell at the tent. Getting her frustrations out through venting would eliminate the anger from running around in her head. She was finished in a short time. She found she had not as much energy for yelling as for talking about how wonderful she was as a child and that her mother needed her back very badly.
Bluesage looked at his watch and saw that the day was half over. He turned and saw she was charged. ‘You ready to listen a minute? Good. One of the best ways to change a bad feeling into a good one is to do something positive about it. Bad feelings have their purpose, after all, and that purpose is to spur you into action. If you just sit there, wallowing in negativity without doing anything about it, that brings you down in two ways. Not only do you feel lousy, you also pass up the opportunity to be powerfully motivated by those lousy feelings.
Yet when you take a positive cue from a negative feeling, things almost immediately begin to change for the better. As soon as you start to do something about it, you are in control and you are moving forward.Take a positive step, and you go from being a victim to being a beneficiary of your negative feeling. Keep on going, and you'll soon leave that negative feeling completely behind. If you seem to be having a lousy day, it's not the day that's lousy.' She began to sob long hard breaths. He continued, but held one hand while he spoke softly to her.
'It's your lack of a positive response to it that makes it seem so bad. So listen to what your bad feeling is attempting to tell you. Get busy, do something about it, and you'll turn it into a triumph. So let’s get this negativity moving. You said to me this morning how you wondered if your young life had anything to do with her choices.' She took a deep breath and looked up at him. Her watery blue eyes touched his heart deeply. He brought her closer as he finished.
'Let’s take that intuition of yours Patty and use it. Get on line and see where the carnivals and circus is in town. We’ll take a bus over and see later on today. Hope is never more than a feeling and smile away.' He smiled at her and she smiled large and beautiful. He could see her soul in her, she was so pure. He held her tight and thanked the Sims God for all his blessings
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